The Tragic end of the Ex-Nun Sr. Teresa

For sure, the letter was from Liverpool. He was anxiously awaiting its arrival. It was the first letter from Martha after she had become a mother. She had written that she and her baby boy were doing well. And she and John had decided to christen him Matthew in his honor. Mathootty’s cup of joy overflowed. It was as though he had become a grandfather himself for the first time in his life.

The letter had come by sea mail, and it had taken about a month to reach him. The young lady who by a quirk of fate was condemned for years to live the life of a genderless person had now become the mother of a healthy child! The marvels of modern medical science! But the last paragraph of her long letter made his mouth agape at the unexpected twists and turns in human destiny.

Martha’s elder sister, Sr. Teresa, had left the convent for good and was back home in the princely State of Cochin. Certainly it would create a rarest of the rare kind of scandals in those conservative days; even worse than the scandal that followed the younger sister’s predicament as a genderless person that led to the annulment of her marriage. Was she not widely known as a dedicated nun committed to her congregation! Then, why at all did she leave the convent? Did she commit some indiscretion in her middle age to merit a dismissal? Or did she come out of the cloisters on her own, perhaps to get married? And that too when she was on the threshold of 40!

Martha was extremely distressed. They had been estranged ever since the Church annulled her marriage on the grounds of her genderless state. The Nun was ashamed of her sister who, she thought, had cleverly deceived the whole world for nearly a decade as a victim of her husband’s lust for his lover. To be fair, on her own free admission Martha had told the truth about herself, and no one could blame her for willfully practising any such deception. However, looking at her cherubic face and her well developed female features, no one could ever take her frank admission seriously. Everyone thought that through the lie this lady was trying to protect her lawfully wedded husband.   That bubble of illusion burst the moment the Church decreed about her genderless status and annulled her marriage. And at the very first time that Martha went to meet her dear sister at the convent after the unfortunate event, the purist nun Sr. Teresa asked her not to enter the sacred premises ever again. That was the end of their connectedness.

And the Nun was in the dark of her subsequent marriage with the Englishman called John Gray and of her departure from India until she left the convent and returned to her roots.

Someone in her village had cared to write to Martha about the Nun’s return and the turmoil that ensued at home and the gossips surrounding the event. Her octogenarian grandmother, whom Mathootty’s uncle had once cured of stomachache at the feast at Vallarpadom, was crestfallen. “What sins my poor son Joseph had committed to deserve two such fallen daughters! But in a way he was lucky not to be on earth to witness this catastrophe. And lucky too, he didn’t have any other children to bear this burden,” the old lady lamented.  Her uncles and aunts cursed the ex-Nun for the much worse scandal that she had now brought on to their head before they had time enough to recover from the earlier blow administered through the younger girl’s marriage annulment.

Martha’s letter ended with an appeal to Mathootty to inquire of the situation of her sister and to extend his support to her in her present predicament. The address of her informant was also given in the letter.

In search of Sr. Teresa

Heavy in heart, Mathootty straightaway went to his wife Thresiamma to break the news, the happy one first, to be followed by the unpleasant one. She was excited at the news of Martha having become a mother of an English boy. Her earlier bitterness about Martha and her suspicion about her husband’s relationship with her had been cleared as he took an active role in her marriage with the Englishman and her departure from India. She genuinely regretted the bad behavior presented by her and was waiting for an opportunity to undo the wrong. She gave him a hug after ensuring no one was around.   

But she was sorry about Sr. Teresa. She suggested a visit to Martha’s grandmother. Since the girl’s marriage with Thomas and the separation that followed immediately after that, the two families had not met personally, although some minimal communication had taken place through correspondence. Now, after thirteen years, every one had become older and the children of those days must have become adults by now. In the beginning it was they who had grievances about Mathootty’s family. Now, with the double blow they had received, they must be grieving for themselves.

“In the circumstances, should we now personally visit them at all? Will it not add insult to injury and burden their minds further?” wondered Mathootty.

“No. Let us go. Of course it’ll be an emotional reunion.” Thresiamma was determined.

Next day they proceeded to Martha’s ancestral home by the family’s houseboat with a few rowers and the senior maid Anna for company.

At Martha’s ancestral home

In a couple of hours the boat was at Martha’s ancestral house. And the first thing they noticed was that their family jetty was in a state of disrepair. Last time when they visited the family, the jetty was kept neat and tidy. And they were then greeted by a battalion of cheerful boys and girls from the family, all well groomed and well dressed. They were all cousins living under the same roof as a joint family. This time they were greeted by a few urchins from the neighborhood playing around. The name of Martha or of Sr. Teresa did not seem to strike a chord in their memory. However, when the visitors pointed in the direction of the house, they called out a name, and a young man came out of the house. He did not recognize the visitors. Eventually it turned out that he was a grandson of the old lady and therefore a younger cousin of both Martha and Teresa. They now recalled having seen him as the seven-year old boy who was playing in dirt when they visited the family last.

The youth somewhat diffidently took the visitors to his bedridden grandmother. There she and Thresiamma faced each other, trying to rein in their tears. Suddenly the tears burst forth. And they were in each others arms till the maid Anna separated them.

“Where are the other members of the family?” Anna asked mainly for breaking the awkward silence.

“Ah! You don’t know. The family properties were partitioned many years ago. Still all the brothers and their families had been happily living together with me in this house. The lone exception was Joseph who had settled in Bombay. But in course of time, due to some misunderstanding, the children separated. That was ten years ago. Now I am alone here with my youngest son Peter. This boy who brought you to me is his son. He has no other child. So we are four of us living now in this large house! The happy and cheerful days you had witnessed are gone. This has now become a silent family. No one is here for me to talk to now. What a change!

“And then we came to know that my poor Martha was truly a genderless person; even the Church had since endorsed that as a fact. All the while we were cursing Thomas for deserting her immediately after their wedding even before they came together. Poor Thomas! I know, to apologize for that to you at this stage is of no use. Still, to ease my conscience, let me express the apology of the whole family for the wrong we had done to him, to his parents and to all of you in your family.”

The old lady burst out crying once again. Thresiamma pacified her, “Ammachi, don’t cry. We too thought that Thomas had wrongly insulted Martha. We ourselves continued to blame him even after Martha herself admitted to her genderless state. We thought she was systematically lying in order to protect him. But I did do a greater wrong – to my Mathootty and to Martha. I suspected that it was a canard jointly hatched and spread by them because they were interested in each other. And when the marriage was annulled by the Church, I had no doubt whatsoever in my mind that it was all due to the machinations of my husband. But soon after that annulment came the same man arranged for her marriage with a foreigner and helped her emigrate from India! I saw a strange inconsistency there. All of a sudden I was convinced of his innocence. So, I have sinned in my mind against the three of them, Thomas included. The first thing I did on realizing the truth was to go to the confessional to seek spiritual punishment and absolution.”

“But, Thresiamma, I am concerned about Martha’s future with the Englishman. What sort of man is he? Is he fully acquainted with her background? Where is she now, any idea? It is over a couple of years since she left, no, Mathootty? Has he too found out the truth about her? I’ve my own apprehensions.”

Mathootty hastened to reply, “No, Ammachi, relax! He worships the very ground she walks on. And she is no longer a genderless person. Doctors in London have corrected the minor anomaly in her. She is a full woman now. They are married and have a son!”

Thresiamma rushed in before the old lady had time to gasp, “And they have named him Mathootty!”

Mathootty corrected her, “No, it is Matthew, not Matthew Kutty or Mathootty. Who ever will give the pet name Mathootty in England?”

The old matriarch could not believe her ears. “So, all these years we had been harboring gross misunderstanding about Thomas, Martha, and you too, Mathootty. And Martha has become a mother now! One more great-grandchild for me! And that too an English boy in the family! My God, I should break the news immediately to every one of our relations and with our neighbors! They are all laughing at us now about Martha and her elder sister Teresa. Let them now hear the story of Martha!”

Mathootty cautioned her, “Wait for a moment, Ammachi. We have already come to know of Sr. Teresa’s return. From whom, can you guess? From Martha. Here is her letter from England, received yesterday. She is anxious to know about her sister’s present situation. We have rushed to see you on receipt of her letter. Can you help us?”

The Grandma had become emotional again. Luckily, the awkward suspense was broken by the timely arrival of her other family members who were once living together with her at the ancestral home but now living separately in the same village. They had been alerted by the urchins seen at the boat jetty. The most familiar face amongst them was that of Augustine, the eldest son of the old lady, whom Mathootty had seen for the first time by the side of his sick mother in their houseboat anchored at Vallarpadam. That was about 23 years ago. And they had met several times after that. Now he looked 60-plus and partly grey.

Cutting the frills, Mathootty straightaway plunged into the subject. Martha had written about her baby boy and was anxious about her sister after her return from the convent. Could he help him get in touch with her?

Augustine’s reply was in a cautious tone, “The nun surprised all of us some five months ago by suddenly appearing before us one afternoon with her tonsured head covered in her white saree. None of us could recognize her at first. She simply told us she had left the convent for good. Reasons she didn’t say. She was quite calm and self-possessed. Her confident smile infuriated mother and she was about to slap her on the face. I held back her raised hand. I don’t want to go into the collective frenzy that followed. That night she stayed with us, without eating or drinking. Next morning she left. No one knew whereto. Pushkaran, the caretaker of Martha’s estate, told us later that she had borrowed from him some money that belonged to Martha and was going to stay with one of her friends at Fort Cochin. That is all we know about her. No one thought it necessary to track her.”

“But she is your niece! You should have had a concern for her”, exclaimed Thresiamma.

“Yes; she is my brother’s daughter, no doubt. But she was born and brought up in Bombay and has been a total stranger to us. And she joined the convent there. Not even once had she written to us. And all along she has been a very willful character. She had no qualms in forbidding her sister from entering the convent premises when she was in dire straits after she lost her job! See, how hotheaded this Sr. Teresa is!”

“Poor Teresa! …. But Martha too was raised in the Bombay culture. Still you have all had much concern for her?” Thresiamma asked.

Augustine’s response was revealing, “Martha was a loving and lovable girl. She was so bubbly and brought much sunshine to the family whenever she visited us. And we, particularly her young cousins, celebrated her midsummer visits to us. And Martha always looked forward to visiting us, and our children were reciprocating even more warmly and cheerfully. On the contrary, Teresa was cold and supercilious towards us. She thought Bombay was everything and we were but primitive villagers! Naturally she forever remained a stranger to us. You know, blood relation alone does not engender love and affinity; connectedness does.”

His mother admonished him, “In spite of it I had asked Augustine on more than one occasion to search for Teresa. After all she is my grandchild and at least an effort from our side would bring some peace to the departed soul of my son Joseph.”

Mathootty and Thresiamma thought it futile to discuss the issue further. They left the house immediately without waiting to  partake of their customary hospitality. They had lost all appetite. They got into their houseboat. Neither of them spoke a word till they reached home.

Teresa traced

Mathootty and his wife had made up their mind. He had a plan. He was confident that the Parish Priest at the Santa Cruz Cathedral at Fort Cochin would be of help in tracing Teresa if she had indeed taken refuge with a friend of hers in town. The Priest would be one of the first persons she would call on.

His anticipation was not misplaced. Accompanied by Thresiamma, he met the Priest the very next day. The Priest instantly warmed up to his cultured English and his baritone voice. After exchanging pleasantries, he presented the case. A cousin of his named Teresa was working as a teacher in Bombay. She left her job and was now living with a friend of hers in Cochin. He was trying to reach out to her, but was not aware of her address in town. She might have attended the services at the Cathedral, in which case the Priest might have come to know of her presence in the town. If so, could he lend him a hand in tracing her? Her grandmother at home was much anxious about her situation.

“So, I see; there must be some conflicts in the family. Well, yes, I have come across a middle-aged lady of your description but I don’t recall her name. She was introduced to me sometime ago by a teacher at the nearby St Mary’s High School, named Josephine. Why not meet Josephine? She may lead you to your cousin. And I hope it would be the same person you are looking for.”

They proceeded to St Mary’s. This was reputedly the first English medium school at Fort Cochin for girls set up in 1889 or so by Canossian sisters on the initiative of the then Bishop of Cochin. The nuns had come from the Portuguese colony of Macao in China. In the beginning, the school was open for admission exclusively for British and Anglo-Indian girls. But now this exclusivity had become history and all eligible candidates were given admission.

On the way Thresiamma expressed the suspicion if Mathootty had withheld from the Priest the convent background of Sr. Teresa on purpose. She said she was surprised that the Priest seemed unaware of it, if indeed it was Teresa herself who had been introduced to him by this Josephine!

His response came with a twinkle in his eye, “Teresa and Josephine might have taken the precaution to hide it from everyone, lest it become a handicap for the ex-nun’s life in her new place. With a note of self-congratulation he added that his hunch was not misplaced; obviously the Priest himself was unaware of it.

Her response was an admiring glance. And she added, “Dear, I have to learn many things from you”.

The ex-Nun Teresa in Cochin

It was not difficult for Mathootty and his wife to gain access to Josephine, although the Nuns there greeted them first with a long and irritating catechism. Obviously they wanted to be sure of their genuineness and the purpose of their visit. But that was expected. Josephine came to see them when her classroom session was over. She was cautious in her response. Finally she said she knew one lady of his description, but of a different name. She might speak with her and let them know if she was interested in meeting them. She asked them to check with her after a week.

Thresiamma was not amused by Josephine’s behavior which she considered rather slighting. And Josephine mentioned of a lady with a ‘different name’? Could it be someone else then?

“I had expected this, Thresiamma, especially as we introduced ourselves as Teresa’s relatives. In her peculiar situation, it would be her friends and relatives who could knowingly or unknowingly spill the beans about her convent background thereby seriously harming her job prospects and social life in Cochin. So Josephine was trying to protect her. And we should be thankful to her for her concern for Teresa. And you too should be tight-lipped about our search for her and our visit to the Priest and to Josephine. And under no circumstances should her people at home including her grandmother come to know of this.”

“I understand”, said she.

“Also, I apprehend a denial next time too when we call on Josephine. And if at all we are lucky to get access to Teresa, we would see a reticent person in her. Be prepared for all eventualities.”

Thresiamma was determined. Her driving force now was her previous guilt for having linked Martha with her husband. And Mathootty understood this, but didn’t give expression to it.

Next time when they called on Josephine, she curtly said her friend was not familiar with the name Mathootty. She was about to dismiss her when Mathootty handed to her the letter written by Martha from Liverpool. She cursorily glanced through it and agreed to show it to her friend and find out from her if she was in any way familiar with this Sr. Teresa or with the writer of the letter. So, come back next week.

On their way back Mathootty asked his wife if she had noticed any recognition in Josephine's eyes, a momentary twinkle, when she glanced through the letter. The name Martha and her having become a mother must have clicked something in her mind. So, Mathootty was certain they could meet Teresa next week.

Came next week, and the determined couple were again at St Mary’s to see Josephine. As anticipated, Josephine feigned no indifference this time. She invited them to her residence that evening and gave them the address. 

Josephine herself received them at her residence. As they were settling on their seats, a stately lady appeared on the scene. She had an athletic physique and a queenly bearing. Mathootty and his wife got up from their seats as courtesy demanded. She asked them to be seated as she herself sat down.

A detached smile lit up her face. She began, “So, you are Mr. Mathootty. I have heard a lot about you….

“And I have seen through this letter the amount of trust my sister has reposed in you. Tell her, I left the convent not in a huff, nor from any selfish motives. Now, since the situation has changed, I’d even return to the convent if only they would permit it….

“Are you surprised, Mr. Mathootty? I left the convent on account of my sister, to be with her in her grief, and to share the rest of my life with her…. And now that I learn from this letter that she is in safe hands, I can gladly return to the convent. But that won’t be. It was an irrevocable act. Rules don’t permit….

“You know, I had no doubt from the beginning that Martha was innocent and that she was not really trying to protect her errant husband. She is one who would fight for her rights. But the world misunderstood her. And when the Church annulled her marriage ten full years later, she became untouchable. In the convent I too supported her removal from the school staff because it would be hard for the student community and their parents to accept the continuance of such a person as teacher. But I strongly pleaded for giving her asylum in the convent. However, the authorities refused to accept her. And they decided that she should not be allowed to enter the convent premises under any circumstances. So, when she came to see me, it was incumbent on me to ask her not to step in to the premises ever again…. It was really, really a hard thing for me….”

She continued, “I don’t want to tell you of the turmoil I had suffered since then. You see, in the absence of our parents and no other siblings for us, I was the only parental figure for her in the world. I was sure she wouldn’t get a welcome reception back home either. And I was powerless to support her. What a fate! Also I was in the dark about what was happening to her since then…. So, the only thing I could do was to come out of the convent to help her.

“My petition was eventually accepted, after a long struggle for three years….

“Straightaway I went back home to my grandmother, not really expecting any welcome there, but to know about Martha…. I didn’t succeed. Josephine is a childhood friend of mine and we have been in regular touch with each other. So I came to her….

“On receipt of Martha’s letter from your hands last week, I found what I came here searching for. You are a messenger of God, Mr. Mathootty. You acted as her parent in my place, or rather as her guardian angel!  Thank you, Sir. I am obliged to you. Now my mind is free. God is great. He surely answers the prayers of His people. Praise Him. And bless you. My mission is fulfilled….

“By the way, but for Martha’s letter now in my hand, I wouldn’t have received you here today!” A nun-like smile lit up her face.

Josephine came in with a tray of tea and four cups. While taking tea, Teresa urged Mathootty to immediately write to Martha congratulating her on her behalf for her marriage with the right man in her life and for her recent motherhood. “And tell her I’m OK here. Also tell her that I had borrowed a princely sum of Rupees one hundred from her local caretaker Pushkaran. And that I’m happy here.”

And she got up, signaling the end of the meeting.

Josephine accompanied us to the boat jetty. On the way she said her friend was now known by her original name Mary. Mary Teacher to the public. Teresa was her convent name.

“She has charged me, and I am charging you now on her behalf, never again call her Teresa and never divulge her earlier nun-status to anyone. Her nun background could harm her. It has been hidden even from the Parish Priest here. People being so conservative, it’d be difficult for them to socially accept an ex-nun. They have peculiar notions about ex-nuns. They are regarded as Judases to their congregations….

“At present Mary is giving tuition to some of the girls studying at St Mary’s. She teaches English and Mathematics. And she is a good teacher at that. She is also giving lessons in Etiquettes and Manners. And Mary Teacher is in good demand especially among the rich British and Anglo-Indian girls here. Within the short period she has been here, she has succeeded in earning more income than I do as a regular teacher! You may write about this too to your Martha.”

Josephine was speaking in Malayalam. Thresiamma expressed her surprise that Teresa behaved very differently from what she and Mathootty had expected.  “We thought she was a haughty, unkind and unloving woman. But we now find her to be a dignified, matronly person, who came out of the cloisters from her loving concern for her sister in trouble.”

Josephine responded, “No one can blame you for that. She has falsely acquired that image and reputation. She is a no-nonsense person, and a strong character. As a classmate I had never seen her crying. She smiles at adversities and at adversaries often baffling them. Even during these trying times for her as a former nun I have not seen her even brooding for a moment. She is friendly, but keeps every one at a safe distance… She might have acquired the reputation for haughtiness from a superficial observation of her external behavior.”

Josephine added with a giggle, “You know, during the past five months, she has been proposed thrice! Two of them were widowers and one a bachelor. She dodged them deftly and effectively. And none of them are showing any ‘jilted lover’ reaction. No ill will. Her approach seems to be, ‘you are welcome to come near me, but not too near’. Typical convent behavior!”

Mathootty was in a daze. The experience of the day was beyond his expectations. He thanked Josephine, “You made our day! Now my priority is to communicate this good news to Martha. She’d be jumping with joy.”

The ex-Nun becomes a mother!

Years later, Mathootty would share the experiences of Teresa before an audience consisting of his favorite grandnephew Thomas Kutty and me.

He said, in no time Mary Teacher had become a popular figure in Fort Cochin especially in Church circles. She would regularly participate in, and lead, Church activities. And before long she came to be known as a very good public speaker and a familiar face among the English speaking population there.

Simultaneously she got into a few business activities too in collaboration with trusted partners. One was a textile shop specializing in fashionable attire for women. Wedding dress sets were her speciality. Expensive dress materials would be imported from Bombay and Madras and tailored and embroidered and finished in her shop. Her products must have been in good demand in and around Cochin; for, she was often seen working overtime. Dressed cakes, for wedding and for special occasions, were another speciality of hers. She had also employed a good number of talented girls and trained them in these artistic activities.  She was carrying these businesses while her teaching assignments were also on the increase. She knew by instinct how to manage her time and activities by delegation.

Enter two orphans in her life

One early morning, two children, a boy and a girl, of the ages of about six and four, were seen abandoned on the doorsteps of the St Mary’s Orphanage. They were dressed well and from their features and the language they spoke one could easily see they were Tamil children born and brought up in well-to-do circumstances outside the Malabar region. They could speak neither Malayalam nor English. The small enclave of Fort Cochin in the princely state of Cochin was then part of the Madras Presidency; yet there were none in the convent who could speak Tamil.

Word about the children soon reached Mary’s ears. From her Tamil acquaintances in Bombay she had acquired some working knowledge of Tamil, and so she rushed to the convent to see the kids. Her heart reached out to them the moment her eyes fell on them. Very lively and pleasant kids, they soon warmed up to her. The boy, the elder of the two, said there was a quarrel between Amma and Appa; and Amma took them away by train, bus and boat. The previous night they were sleeping in some place with Amma. She was crying. “This morning we woke up here.”

With the permission of the convent authorities, Mary took them home. That day she became their mother.

This was charity at its best, and neither she nor any one in her circles then had the gift to prophesy that it would lead to the ultimate tragedy of her life.

“When was that, Uncle?” asked Thomas Kutty.

“Well, Mary might have been in Cochin for about three years by then. That means, in 1925.”

“Were you in touch with her in those days, Uncle, as you were with Martha?” TK inquired.

“You see, TK, Martha was a member of the family, not because she was my cousin’s wife for a brief little moment, but mainly for the exceptionally warm emotional bonding our whole family had with her. And when the whole world misunderstood her, I took it upon myself single-handedly to do something for her. Concerning her sister Mary, I had no such obligations. Thresiamma and I concerned ourselves in her affairs for the sake of Martha. So, the relationship was rather derivative and formal. And Mary herself was a sort of remote character for us. Hence the communication between us was occasional….

“On our next visit she proudly displayed the children to us arrayed in princely attire and informed us they had been given conditional baptism.”

“What is conditional baptism, Uncle?” inquired TK.

“The children were not aware if they were baptized or not. Their names didn’t give any indication either. As you know, no one is allowed to receive baptism more than once in one’s lifetime. In doubtful cases the Church can administer conditional baptism. So, Fabian and Florence were conditionally baptized. And, reportedly, several of her friends had expressed interest in sponsoring the children for baptism….

“Next time we visited Mary, the children had been formally admitted to nearby schools, the boy at Santa Cruz and the girl at St Mary’s. Till then Mary was giving them homeschooling. The kids were doing well at school. Josephine said the boy was becoming a bully too, as per reports coming from his school. Thresiamma wondered if Mary was not spoiling the kids. I cautioned her from airing any such criticism before the proud foster-mother….

“But, you would have noticed, TK, women are definitely the weaker sex when it comes to controlling their tongue. And Thresiamma was no exception. On our subsequent visit to Mary (which was undertaken at the urging of Martha), she could not control herself. She made some insinuating remark about the upbringing of the children.

“Mary’s reaction was immediate:

‘You see, Thresiamma, I have spent the prime of my life for the universal good of humanity. My love was spread above and beyond individuals. Then I came out to give my love and protection to my sister. She is now in safe hands and doesn’t need my services. And now I’m living for these children. I want to give them motherly love as that no other mother has given. And I’ll do anything for their happiness.’

“That was the end of our conversation.”

“That was curt on her part, Uncle. Thresiamma Aunty made the remark to help her see the reality. But Mary snubbed her. And she lost an opportunity to correct her own course,” TK observed.

“Yes and no, TK. Thresiamma could have been a bit cautious and tactful if she had genuinely wanted to help her see the reality. And Mary reacted impulsively. You see, how carelessly we act and spoil relationships!

“And, privately known to me, Thresiamma had a hidden reason too. We had some serious misunderstanding between us then. So she wanted to spite me by being uncharitable to Mary. Are you surprised?”

“No, Uncle. Such family politics work everywhere. Whenever my Mom and Dad are in a cold war, she takes it upon us children. Anyway, could you soon mend your relationship with Mary?”

Mary takes her children to England for a picnic

Mathootty said, “For a few years we didn’t have any communication with her. Then, on my 55^th birthday, in the year 1934, I received a particularly long letter from Martha. And I came to know from her that Mary and children had been to England for a picnic!”

Mathootty continued, “Her letter was apparently to convey her greetings to me; she had also used that letter to share with me her concern about Mary’s excessive attachment to the children. Fabian was 15 years old then and Florence 13.

“In that letter, Martha had recalled to me her proposal to visit Cochin the previous year for a family reunion; but that was to be cancelled at the last moment due to bereavement in their family in England. Now Mary’s visit to Liverpool, she thought at first, was to compensate for that lost opportunity. So, she was excitedly looking forward to the elder sister’s visit as that would mean their meeting after a long gap of 15 years. They arrived in London after a sea voyage that lasted less than a month, and were received by John, Martha and children.  All of them were excited. They spent some ten days sightseeing in the City and its surroundings including Oxford, Stratford-upon-Avon and other places of historical importance and scenic spots. Then they spent some time around Liverpool and Manchester. Finally they had a one-week trip to the Scottish cities of Glasgow and Edinburgh. Fabian and Florence thoroughly enjoyed the one-month holiday. Then they left for home….

“After their departure, John and Martha sat together to share their responses to her sister’s visit. John felt that Mary had not shown the kind of warmth expected of a sister. It occurred to him that her sole objective was to make the visit a picnic for the benefit of her children. And she made use of the conveniences provided by Martha. Their son Matthew overheard the conversation and he came forward to endorse his father’s observation. He added that the two black children were selfish and rude….

Mathootty continued, “Martha had the serious apprehension if Mary might eventually fare well at the hands of those two spoilt children. And she beseeched me to have a protective eye on her sister and her family although she conceded that Mary was a strong-willed person who wouldn’t listen to any advice from anyone….

“Thresiamma was not amused with Martha’s appeal. She was certain Mary would give us a humiliating snub in case we tried to intervene in her affairs. I could not agree more with her. Yet I was troubled in my conscience. Soon an opportunity presented itself. I had to pass through Fort Cochin in connection with the marriage of my friend Shyamal Prabhu’s daughter. And I dropped in at St. Mary’s to say hello to the friendly Josephine. And what she revealed was shocking.”

Fabian absconds

“She said Fabian had absconded! It happened a month before. The immediate provocation was the taunts he received from his classmates. On the very first day he returned to school after his England trip, his envious classmates surrounded him and began ragging him. You see, even the richest of people wouldn’t indulge their children with such expensive picnics especially in those days. They taunted him about the true nature of Mary Teacher’s relationship with him, about his legitimacy, about his ‘fictitious’ story of his white cousins in England, and so on. His response was met with more jeering. He showed them his cousin Matthew Gray’s black-and-white photograph. Someone laughed and said the black Fabian had a ‘gray’ cousin. A roaring laughter followed. And one thing led to another. When found himself at the end of his tether, he responded physically and behaved like a frenzied bull, injuring many.

“Next morning when Mary woke up, the boy was not seen anywhere in the house or surroundings. The whole neighborhood was alerted; but none had seen him. Mary found her purse empty. Then Florence reported her gold chain was missing. Mary heaved a sigh of relief. So the 15-year old boy had the presence of mind to take care of himself!

“Josephine continued, ‘Mary is keeping a brave front. She calmly faces anyone who reminds her of Fabian’s rash behavior. But, I know, she is bleeding within’….”

Thomas Kutty could not help interrupting the flow, “It must have been a big blow to Mary. A much bigger blow than the one she had suffered on account of her denial of Martha following her marriage annulment and dismissal from the school in Bombay.”

Mathootty continued, “Yes; it must have been. From Josephine I went straight to Mary. If she was embarrassed to face me after Thresiamma’s earlier uncharitable comment about her spoiling the children, she did not show it. She was courteous but certainly not warm. I asked her if Martha had been informed of Fabian’s decamping. She said No, and charged me not to tell her.”

“So you kept it from Martha?” I asked.

“No! You see, my relationship was with Martha, and that was not determined by Mary or anyone else. I straightaway wrote to Martha of what I heard and what I saw. Martha was certainly unhappy with the development. She, like Thresiamma, had the apprehension that the spoilt children might eventually bring sorrow to their foster mother….

“Years passed, and I had lost contacts with Mary.  My communication with Martha, her husband John and the young Matthew continued with even greater warmth…. And then, for some reason, my letters bounced, returned undelivered. Something might have happened to them at the commencement of the Second World War….”

TK, “Uncle, you had told us earlier about Martha’s disappearance from your horizon.”

Mathootty said, “Yes, after that I lost whatever motivation I had for being in touch with her sister.”

The tragic end of the ex-Nun

“But, Uncle, you are one of the rare persons who pay close attention to nurturing friendship with every one with whom you come into contact. And we see that Mary is perhaps a lone exception among your friends. You lost interest in maintaining connectedness with her!” I remarked.

“Unfortunately, yes. Yet, on one more time I met her, albeit briefly. That was on the occasion of her daughter’s marriage. It was in the year 1944. The groom was the son of a local businessman. She gave her a good dowry. Also, at the insistence of the boy’s father, she signed an open Will transferring all her assets including her residential house and her business establishments in the name of Florence. And the Will was handed over to the sole beneficiary. Her friend Josephine told me she had admonished her about this thoughtless act. And Mary expressed her annoyance at her mistrust of her daughter. They were both 62 at that time.”

TK, “Yes; any good friend would act as Josephine did. And any wise parent would make the Will a secret document, signed, sealed and delivered for safe custody with her legal advisor.”

“But what had happened to Fabian, Uncle? Didn’t he return from his chosen exile to claim his share?” I inquired.

“No. According to Josephine, there was no trace of him, except that there were unconfirmed reports that somebody from Cochin had seen him somewhere in Bombay. Anyway, he seemed to have disappeared for good, and his sister had become the sole inheritor of the foster mother’s legacy.”

“And what about Josephine? She must have retired from service by then?” asked TK.

“Yes; she had retired two years before, on attaining the retirement age of 60. After that she had shifted to her hometown. As an unmarried woman, she had a share in her ancestral property there….

“A few years ago, on Martha's sixty-fifth birth anniversary to be precise, my mind went through the good old times when she was spending her days of innocence with us. I was overwhelmed with sentiment. I hoped, or imagined, that she and her family were still alive, living somewhere, although unable to contact me.  All of a sudden the picture of her elder sister came alive in my mind. And, on an impulse I decided to visit her….

Mathootty continued, “Your cousin Justin - my grandson – had accompanied me for support. We went to Mary’s house, to see it occupied by some other family. When questioned, they expressed their ignorance about any person of the name Mary having ever lived in the house. They said they had bought the house from one Florence about a year before…. Strange, I thought.

“She might be living with Florence, I fancied. But first I went to Josephine’s house forgetting that she had left the place after her retirement. And there too we saw some strangers living.

“And we went to see Florence. She received us courteously. She introduced to us her husband whom I had briefly seen as her groom on their wedding day ten years before. She had three children by then, all the three doing well….

“When inquired about her foster mother, she became emotional, nearly hysterical. She said mother had left home one morning and didn’t return. Their search with police assistance didn’t yield any results. Then, a fortnight later, they heard the rumor about the bloated body of an old woman found floating in the Vembanad Lake. Could that be Mother’s? Florence and her husband went to inspect the body. The body was lying face down in the water and the face had been severely disfigured with fish bites. Then she saw a black mole on the right shoulder of the body. It was her Mother’s, no doubt!

“Then she began sobbing before us. And she launched into an affectionate criticism of her mother. She said there was no need for her to walk alone at her old age of seventy-plus. Nor did she have any need for working to earn money by giving private tuition. Florence and her husband had invited her to live with them. But she was adamant. She wanted to live in the same old house till her death. Being a proud person, she might have hated to live the rest of her life dependent on her daughter. How foolish and willful was she! They would have cared for her as the apple of their eye.”

“To my query when this happened, she said it was now fifteen months since she lost her mother.

“She invited us for lunch. But we were not in the right mood to eat.”

I wondered, “What kind of accident was that, Uncle?”

“You seem to entertain some doubts about the story? If so, for what reason, may I ask?” Mathootty asked.

I said I couldn’t so easily verbalize my discomfort about the story.

“Well, Justin who was with me had his doubts too.  On our way back he asked me if I believed in her story. And I demanded him to explain why he asked. He said:

 ‘I don’t trust in her hysteria and sobbing so long after her mother’s death. Also, while Florence’s face was crying, I noticed her eyes were not. And her affectionate chiding of her mother after her death sounded borne out of hypocrisy. She obviously wanted to impress you as a dutiful daughter who had done everything possible to protect her obstinate mother in spite of her obstinacy. After all, she must have known that a fiercely individualistic character like Mary wouldn’t like to be dependent on any one particularly. She wanted to lead an independent life of her own….

‘Come to think of it, I even suspect the true purpose of her leaving convent life. To my mind, she came out seeking freedom and fresh air. And she used Martha’s name as an alibi.’

Mathootty continued, “After Justin had become an ardent fan of Sherlock Holmes, the boy had started closely observing the nuances of human behavior.  Yes, there was a strange inconsistency or asymmetry or de-synchronization in Florence’s narration and in her overall body language. I too had noticed that. But why so?

“All of a sudden I had the impulse to visit the Convent that was on the way. We met the Mother Superior. She was new in Cochin and was not acquainted with me. Her Assistant was called in. We instantly recognized each other. She whispered something into the ears of the Superior, and both of them disappeared into the interior after bidding us to wait in the parlor. The Assistant returned after a few minutes with a sealed envelope in her hand. She said, Mary had entrusted the envelope to her before her death with instruction to open it only two years year after her death. However, it might be delivered either to Mr. Mathootty or to Ms. Josephine one year after her death in case any one of them happened to come to the Convent in search of her. She continued: ‘Now, on your arrival the one-year stipulation has been fulfilled, and I am delivering it to you. Please sign the receipt and give it to me for record’….”

“I was about to open the envelope when she asked me to keep everything confidential. Then she narrated what was happening for some time before Mary’s death. She said:

‘As you know, Mary was a regular visitor at the Convent for years, a much respected and knowledgeable lady. During one such visit some three months before her death, she called the then Mother Superior aside and confided to her about some serious developments in her family. I was privy to that conversation. She handed over a substantial amount of money to her in cash and said this money night be used, after her death, for our orphanage. Then she said this donation be kept a secret from her daughter lest the girl might physically attack her. For a while, Florence had been demanding  transfer of all of the mother’s assets to her name without waiting for the Will to become operational, i.e., without waiting for her death. There were frequent quarrel at home on account of this. And now the old lady feared for her life.

‘She visited us once again; that was about a fortnight before her death. She had wounds on her head and elbows. She was unable to speak from physical and mental suffering. At length she managed to convey that Florence and her husband had come to her the previous night demanding subscription of her signature to some document in stamp paper. When she persistently refused, they physically lifted her and threw her out from the house. She fell on the courtyard. Then they locked the house from outside and went away. After spending the night on the open veranda, she walked to the Convent in the wee hours of the morning and was in the Convent seeking asylum in the Orphanage! The same orphanage from where she had once picked up Florence and her brother for adoption.  

‘She didn’t eat or drink or speak after that, except to say that none of her acquaintance should come to know of her fate, other than you and Josephine. She said enigmatically, ‘My life is over’. And her final wish was that she be given a pauper’s burial in an unmarked grave. And everything to be kept under wraps. She died from physical exhaustion and mental agony. Her body was buried in our private cemetery without any monument to mark the spot as per her wish.

‘Josephine has not visited us for long. You are the first one to call on us inquiring about her.’

Mathootty continued, “I asked her if the Police had not come looking for her as a missing person, whether she had seen any advertisement from the Department. She said, No. Of course I too had not seen any Police advertisement. Florence’s husband was influential.

“I opened the envelope in the presence of the Nun. There was a small piece of paper in it. And there was one line on it, reading:

“Sorry, Thresiamma and dear Josephine: I ignored your advice.”

TK said, “Sorry Uncle, you have no one in her family to share this information with, Martha being untraceable.”